It's all about the kids.

I listen to NPR in the car and for the past two weeks on a show called "On Point with Tom Ashbrook", there have been two topics that really caught my attention. Last week the topic was about the need to have kids play outside more and nature being used as a classroom. Yesterday the topic was about infants and toddlers spending time in front of screens and what kind of effect it has on them. Screens as in television, computer, iPad, telephones and so on. Both of these topics really made me think about the things that I'm doing as a parent. How am I engaging with my kids?

My wife always says that it's because of me that the family is more active and healthy. Aside from the fact that I'm the main cook in the house, I didn't think that I was the catalyst for such a transition. But when I took a closer look I realized that she was right. Yes, she is always right and I need to simply admit that more often. Committing to a healthy lifestyle may have started out as a selfish one but it soon became a family mission. And when I say a healthy lifestyle I'm talking about so many aspects outside of just eating healthy foods and getting the heart rate going. 

I LOVE the outdoors, always have. My childhood was spent predominantly outside climbing trees, making mud pies and frolicking. Let me tell you, frolicking is a lost art. Even as an adult I still love climbing trees and just being in an open field. I wanted to pass along those same experiences to my children. While my oldest isn't much of a nature person she would prefer being outside with the family rather than inside doing nothing (though she is at the teenage stage and Instagram seems to be taking over her life). My toddler can't get enough of the outdoors and if we had a treehouse or a tent in the backyard I'm certain she would live outside. 

Butterfly sanctuary with my youngest

It's only been recently that I've made the conscious effort to use the outdoors as a classroom for my toddler to learn about things like animals, colors, plants and even numbers.

At a state park in California with my oldest when she was  five.

But when I think about it I've always used nature as a teaching tool even when I thought it was just a way to get out of the house and get some fresh air.

As far as screen time goes I will admit that some attention needs to be paid to that. My goal was to have my little one watch no television at all for as long as possible. I know that sounds like an impossible task but we were making it work for a while. When she was up, the television was never on and no one was on their devices. The only time the television was on was when she was sleeping. 

But that all changed when everyone in the house got sick. The cold circulated through everyone and stayed in the house for over a week. The only person who didn't get the worst of it with a stuffy nose and sneezing was the little one. The television became the need to detach and an escape for the little one and whoever the main caregiver was at the time. Although we do try and make sure that someone is actively watching Mickey Mouse and Doc McStuffins, it's not always the case. 

I'm slowly working on limiting her TV time by simply not turning it on when she wants it. Of course tantrums get thrown initially but I distract her attention with coloring, puzzles and toys. Soon she forgets that she's missing the newest adventures in Mickey Mouse Clubhouse. Now there are certainly days when we are getting on each other's nerves and we both could use a break. We did the outside thing, we colored, we played with blocks, we read stories and our patience is wearing thin with one another. Those days I look forward to Jake and the Neverland Pirates to help us decompress and reset our emotions. 

Not all TV is bad and having it on doesn't necessarily mean that you will turn out to be a bad or less attentive person. My wife pointed out that she grew up with the TV constantly on in the background during her childhood and she is one of the most driven and intelligent people I know. 

Parenting doesn't come with a handbook or set of rules to follow as you go along. You do what you feel is best for that moment and hope that things will come out alright. And don't judge other parents for the things that they do because you never know what their situation could be. In my soon-to-be fifteen year of parenting I've learned that I know nothing. Everyday brings about a new set of challenges or failed attempts of tried and true tactics. All you can do is keep trying. Don't take yourself (or your kids) too seriously, find friends who can share your pain, laugh more often and have a glass of wine.